Sammy the Banana Slug? Hoya Saxa? Geoduck?
You don’t have to look far behind the sideline of a college football game or running through the concourse of a college basketball game to see the team’s college mascot showing support and rallying the fans.
But, what happens when you look for the college mascot and you have to do a double take just to gather yourself and make sure you only ate the portabella mushrooms and not the old, weird looking ones in the open plastic bag.
The following college mascots will not only make you question your strange eating habits, but also make you dive deeper into your own psyche as far as why you chose that school. After all, the mascot is a reflection of the students’ right?
University of California Santa Cruz
No. 10 University of California Santa Cruz
Ah, the land of fruits and nuts. UCSC Will never be accused of being a sports college. So, students needed something to occupy their time. With the unofficial adoption of the humorous, phlegmatic slug, the lack of the school’s athletic prowess has become just that…humorous. At one point, college officials tried to switch the mascot to a sea lion, but the protest from students was so great that the slimy yellow slug was reinstated…what next a baby seal?
No. 9 Georgetown Hoya Saxa
umm (clearing my throat) I mean the bulldog….no pretty sure it’s G-town Hoya Saxa. What the hell is Hoya Saxa? According to Wikipedia, Hoya Saxa is the official cheer and “college yell” of Georgetown University and its athletics teams. Hoya is an Ancient Greek word usually transliterated from οἵα as hoia from the word hoios (οἷος) meaning “such” or “what” as in “what manner of”, and is used in certain Biblical quotations. Saxa however, is Latin for “rocks” or “small stones”. So, next B-ball game you attend when G-town is playing Cuse’ you can yell, “GO WHAT ROCKS!”
No. 8 The Fighting Okra.
Okra is a Southern staple on the dinner table—and the ferocious Fighting Okra is a staple at Mississippi’s Delta State University. Although the school’s athletic department has chosen the more appropriate Statesmen and Lady Statesmen as monikers for its teams, the Fighting Okra has long served as an unofficial mascot and student favorite. Kind of reminds me of the crazy scene in “Tinker Bell” the movie when she disrupts the weeds and they come roaring down the hill to take out the entire town of tinker fairies…I’ve been waiting too much T.V. with my daughter.
No.7 Scottsdale Community College’s Fighting Artichoke.
Artichoke? Controversial? If you flashback to an era of dissent that occurred a few decades ago then yes, it was. When the college’s administration went against the wishes of a good portion of the student body and pumped millions of dollars into its growing athletic program, the student government revolted. So when asked by the administration to select a mascot, the student government proposed three options: an artichoke, a rutabaga or a scoundrel. The artichoke won. It could have been worse – the fifth choice name was the Granite Reefers.
No. 6 Stamford University
While the administration is quick to point out that Stanford does not have an official mascot; the Tree – which is a member of the Stanford Band – has become its unofficial representative. The Tree is actually a Redwood tree, which is common in and around the city of Palo Alto, in which Stanford is located. I am sure that after the movie Back II the Future popularized the phrase “Make like a tree and beat it” students must have loved hearing that about a billion times!
No. 5 St. Louis University The Billiken
Looks a bit like a mix between a French Bulldog and Yoda, with giant pointed ears, but apparently, the odd-looking creature bears a striking resemblance to one of SLU’s early coaches. Billikens were all the rage for a six-month period in the early 1900s, and are intended to be used as good luck charms. For a sports team, why not?
Horned or Horny?
No. 4 TCU Horned Frogs
Cue the jokes now…9 thousand coed students living in close quarters with a mascot that has the word “horn” in the title…yeah, you get my drift. But actually it’s believed to have ancient powers; the horned frog – the state reptile of Texas, in fact – is the official mascot of Texas Christian University. In truth, it’s not a frog at all, and it doesn’t really have horns. He also used to be known as Addy the All-American Frog, but perhaps because that wasn’t ferocious enough, he was renamed Super Fog in 1979.
No. 3 WKU Big Red
Apparently, someone really pissed off Grimace from McDonald’s and stole the idea, but came up with the brilliant idea to color him red instead of purple. Not sure if anyone really knows where big red grimace came from. But he or she is furry, energetic and smells like French fries…who doesn’t love French fries?
No. 2 Evergreen State College Geoduck. Is not geographical nor a Duck…discuss.
What comes to mind when you see this magnificent green thing conjures up images of pickles that no longer have that crispy crunch. Speedy the Geoduck (pronounced “Gooey Duck”), more commonly known as a clam. Why the school chose a phallic mollusk to represent its sports teams, no one seems to know. Although the school’s fight song gives some hints: “Go, Geoducks go; through the mud and the sand, let’s go. Siphon high, squirt it out, swivel all about, let it all hang out. Go, Geoducks go. Stretch your necks when the tide is low. Siphon high, squirt it out, swivel all about, let it all hang out.” Well if you ask me, the Gooey-duck is already letting it all hang out, and should be kept under warps!
No. 1 Grays Harbor College Charlie the Choker
Certainly tops my list! Not only the most menacing mascot, but also the most misunderstood of all college mascots. Contrary to popular belief, he is not a minor character from the movie Deliverance nor is he handing out candy to children. He is a logger. A choker-setter is a pivotal role in logging operations and is the strong, courageous individual who places a cable with large clamps around a log to remove it from the forest. The explanation doesn’t diminish his cru cut style hair and that smile…Good luck sleeping tonight!